Turkish Travel Blog
Ramadan is a religious period of time that tests the strength, determination and goodwill of Muslim men and women all over the land. Mortal souls that follow the religion of Islam put themselves through the ultimate endurance test by abstaining from food, drink and intimate contact during the hours of daylight.
The rays of the hot sun beat down on their tired bodies making their brows drip fiercely with sweat as they try to go about the mundane routines of day to day living. Their dry throats desperately need a glass of ice -cold water and they try to ignore the growling hunger pains that are lingering in their empty bellies.
They do not give into the temptation of pleasure for the body until the sun disappears and the skies are dark. Their minds are focused on pure thoughts, self-discipline and empathy for those in poverty who have no choice but to live like this, every day of their lives.
The Ramadan period in 2011 started on the 1st of August and those of you who walk streets trying to spot the people of Turkey who have volunteered for a month of self-cleansing and religious reflection may be disappointed.
The Turks are not vocal about their choice to fast. They complete it with dignity and a silence that builds a wall around them, keeping them safe from impure thoughts, words and actions. To gain an understanding of this practice that is accused by some of being outdated and unhealthy, you would have to wake before the hours of dawn or in my case, live with someone who views Ramadan as his opportunity to get closer to the Almighty.

It is actually known as Ramazan in Turkey but that makes little difference as to what happens in one of the most important events in the Islamic calendar. My husband is fasting and the past three weeks have seen some obstacles arise. These obstacles which occur every year during Ramadan, no longer test the strength of our marriage. We have been there and done it, and any change to our routines is old hat.
Ramadan in 2011 – The Dilemma I Faced
Ramadan is not a set calendar date. It comes early every year by ten days. The result is that in 2011, it has fallen within one of the hottest months of the year. My husband also works in a restaurant and this is one of the busiest months when he will cater for hundreds of hungry tourists that are eager to consume English breakfasts, hamburgers for lunch and juicy steaks for dinner.
This is not the winter months when the hours of daylight are shorter and very few tourists trickle through the door of the restaurant. This is different, the stakes are higher and the goal posts have moved.
I asked my husband to abstain this year, offering money to charities instead as a penance for not completing the fast. However I knew the answer would be “no” all along. My worries about the heat and the long days would have to take a back seat.
I had no worries about his health or mental well-being. This is because he has fasted every year since he made the transformation from a boy to a man. The ability to undergo this test of strength is firmly ingrained into his character and lifestyle.

Waiting for the Side Effects – The Bad Moods
After being married for five years, I can spot instantly when the side effects of fasting start to take place. Fatigue is one of them and this in turn lead to bad moods. Patiently I ignored them along with the long periods of silence. At his work, all the tourists saw the smiling face that jokes with them and ensures their holiday is one that they enjoy.
At home, my husband felt comfortable enough to take the mask off and bring the feelings of hunger and thirst up to the surface. While, I wanted to support him in this time of self-reflection, there was a need to say something to prevent the situation getting even worse. From experience in past years, words said in the heat of a moment only leads way to bad vibes at a time when calm and peace are required. A couple of quiet words and reflection soon solved this problem.
Next Comes The Bad Breath
After spending eleven years in Turkey, I can normally spot someone who is fasting after speaking a couple of words with them because 99.9% of the time they will have bad breath. What can you do? Nothing, it is more polite just to ignore it.
The Lost Friendship
Not all Turks will spend the month fasting. It is a personal decision which sees no consequences if they don’t. Over the years though, I have noticed that some Turks who are not fasting seem to be more vocal about Ramadan than the Turks that simply want to keep their heads down and complete this period of reflection without drama.
One close Turkish friend who is an atheist decided to launch unexpectedly into a serious ranting and raving session about the stupidity of Ramadan and the damage that can be caused to people’s health.
Considering that Ramadan had no effect on her life what so ever, I was rather bemused by her words and intrigued as to what had caused this sudden outburst. I never discovered as the conversation was cut short when she overstepped the mark in order to justify her hatred of Islam. She had called my husband “stupid” for fasting and along with the end of the conversation; our friendship reached a point beyond repair.

Why Didn’t I take Part in Ramadan?
The conversation this year was the same as it is every year. I get asked if I will be “holding the fast ” and my answer is no. The same people then ask if hubby is fasting and my response is pretty much the same as “do fish swim in the sea?”
They are bemused as to how two people can live in the same house but only one of them will fast. Don’t get me wrong, I have been there and tried it but my soul and mind is one of the weaker kinds when temptation will take over in the darkest moment.
I would only hamper my husband in his fast, with moans that would describe my hunger and thirst pains in-depth. I am not strong willed when it comes to abstaining from alcohol and nicotine, so abstaining from food and drink would turn me into a nervous wreck.
The month of Ramadan is not an easy task and I fully admit that I have neither the strength nor dedication to do it. Instead I make conscious efforts to support my husband by avoiding reference to food, drink or personal contact within the hours of daylight.
So on the 29th of August, the last day of fasting will fall upon us. We will then embark on three days of celebration called Seker Bayram or the Sugar holiday. Thoughts of Ramadan will be placed to the back of my mind…until 2012 when we do it all again.
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